Thread:Tupka217/@comment-24896760-20140503162001/@comment-1038387-20140503163642

It had no structure to speak of. "In his first appearance, he did that. And he faight him. And then. And then. And then. And oh yeah, he was a thuggee."

A character bio starts with the biographical background, if avialable - so that he's a member of a thuggee cult and what drives him should be mentioned in the first sentence(s). Everything he's done can come after, though it needs better structure.