Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-6496486-20130215014628/@comment-3361105-20130215204140

Well, firstly, let me clear up a little error: It was Batgirl, not Batwoman, who was crippled during Batman: The Killing Joke.

That said, The Killing Joke is definitely a good place to start with the Bat Family - particularly Batgirl.

For Red Hood/Jason Todd I recommend:
 * Batman: A Death in the Family
 * Batman: Under the Hood
 * Red Hood: The Lost Days

For Robin:
 * Batman and Son
 * Batman and Robin Vol 1
 * Batman Incorporated Vol 1

For Batman:
 * Knightfall
 * Batman: The Long Halloween
 * Batman: Dark Victory

For Nightwing:
 * Robin: Year One

For Batwoman:
 * Batwoman: Elegy

Those are pretty much all you need. Most of the previous arcs go unmentioned or are only referenced. I would say, though, that with the exception of Damian Wayne (Robin), you don't actually need to have read any of the other stuff. Especially in the case of Red Robin, whose history has been almost completely retconned.