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Al used his life savings to open his first diner on Space City Robinson, encouraging people through the door with a two-for-one breakfast deal. Their first client was the undesirable Lobo returning from a botched bounty job. The uncouth lout immediately propositioned Darlene and pinched her back

Al's Diner was founded by the line cook, Al, and his faithful waitress, Darlene. Unfortunately for them it became one of the favoured hangouts of the destructive bounty hunter, Lobo.

History

Beginnings

Al used his life savings to open his first diner on Space City Robinson, encouraging people through the door with a two-for-one breakfast deal. Their first client was the undesirable Lobo returning from a botched bounty job. The uncouth lout immediately propositioned Darlene and pinched her backside. He ordered a six pack of beer while Al appeased the irascible dog that followed him in with a plate of meat. Things got worse when a disgruntled former partner of Lobo's, Jonas Glim, entered and started a fight. The brawl between the two smashed up the brand new interior before they both left without paying for the food or the damage.[1]

Al managed to fix the diner up over the next few days, even adding a new observation deck; of course his insurance premiums tripled and he lost his no-claims discount with a chance of future refusal as well. They optimistically awaited the first customer of their grand re-opening only to look on in dismay as Lobo returned with his latest bounty in tow. After a little more sexual harassment, Darlene led them to the observation window. To make matters worse, Marifran Kutsey-Not and the Kamikaze Bitch-Babe Bikers from Hell arrived, conducting a drug induced extreme feminist man-murdering rampage. They were about to execute Al when they were all savagely killed themselves by Lobo, who had been exposed to two full moons and transformed into a werewolf. The diner was again torn up in the carnage.[2]

Lobo once more attended the grand re-re-opening, hoping to grab some breakfast before hauling his latest bounty into Bunsen. Before he had even served Lobo, a gang of bandits held up Al, mistaking the diner for Bunsen's Bounty. Lobo surprisingly intervened non-violently, actually escorting the thieves to the correct destination, preserving both Al and his diner. Lobo told the grateful Al how he had killed all but one of the outlaws to claim their warrants when he returned to the diner for a drink. He wasn't concerned about Young Johnny Old who escaped, as he was chained to an anti-tamper ball of plasteek. Johnny, however, happened to be sitting in a booth nearby trying to remove the explosive with a fork. The detonation destroyed the diner worse than ever.[3]

With the grand re-re-re-opening, Al's Diner was actually running a profit, thanks to the influx of people into town for the intergalactic prayer meeting.[4] Sadly, Al's insurance provider had labelled him the worst risk they've ever had and increased his premiums one thousand percent! To compensate, Al decided to rent out his back room for extra income. This inconveniently coincided with the wreckage of Lobo's Spacehog, grounding him until he could repair it. He, and the remains of his bike, moved into the space. Diners complained about all the noise from Lobo's constant repairs until he completed his hog and ploughed through the wall triumphantly, just before the engine exploded in the middle of the restaurant due to a faulty part he ordered.[5]

Bankrupt, Al waited until the bane of his existence left for another job so he and Darlene could sneak out themselves, tearfully abandoning their ruined diner.[6]

A Fresh Start

Al and Darlene settled on Planet Malteez where they found a location in Hammer City. It wasn't in a good neighbourhood but Al hoped to make the most of it. He restored the crummy space into a great restaurant only to fall into despair when he discovered Lobo lived just above him. Lobo had become a private investigator and was actually an asset when a trio of thugs tried to intimidate Al into paying protection money.[7] Lobo's first case on the other hand, brought a lot of unwanted attention and ultimately destroyed not the diner, but the entire city surrounding it. What good was an intact diner with no clients.[8] But for once Al and Darlene's luck had changed. The Maltiez government rebuilt Hammer City, and Al's Diner was the only place the thousands of workers could go to eat.[9]

Franchise

The Hammer City branch was a huge success, and Al's Diner was expanded into a franchise, with diners all across the galaxy. Al became a very rich man, and he and Darlene hosted a surprise birthday for Lobo on Weezil's World. The sign outside was initially an anagram to fool Lobo, inviting him to "Ned's Lair." The party was a drunken hive of chaos, with Lobo bringing the party to an end by setting the place on fire during a fight. Al wasn't phased the entire night, and as Lobo acknowledged yet another one destroyed venue, Al presented him with his birthday gift. As Lobo read the deed to his very own diner, Al laughed loudly as it burned to the ground.[10]

Al planned to expand his business even further. He set up a lunch meeting with his bankers at his "luxy" Doofer Street diner, but his banquet plans were ruined, along with the restaurant, by the Fat Bastards gang and Lobo's subsequent apprehension of them.[11] Fortunately, the franchise did thrive despite all the setbacks. Lobo first encountered one as a mobile concession. He assumed the owner had done something to the real Al, but the cook produced the franchise agreement that permitted him the right to use the name, recipes, and his very own Darlene. Al also sent out warning notices to all the franchise holders regarding a rogue customer who consistently destroyed diners on a regular basis.[12]

After not having seen Lobo for quite some time, he showed up again at the diner Al operated not far from Quarantino's Agency. Lobo had only come to get tanked up before going to an organised fight, but asked Al to babysit a live bounty while he was gone.[13] The Big Bopper eventually regained consciousness while the bounty hunter was gone and lustfully chased Darlene around, smashing through two walls which caused the building to collapse.[14]

Hoping to escape Lobo for good, Al took his food to the streets, cooking for the endless drivers on the road world of Kolossus. Al's Mobile Diner, driven by Darlene, served moving vehicles on the bustling highways. Unfortunately, Lobo had tracked a bounty warrant to Kolossus and started a chain of events that led to a pile up of 23 billion vehicles of which the Mobile Diner was one of the casualties.[15]

Planet Al's

Al's dream of having a fine dining restaurant was eventually realised in "Planet Al's". The high class establishment, with high prices to match, gained Al some lucrative regulars, including Mafia Don Alfonzo Alonzo Delonzo Linguine. But it was clientèle like the Don that attracted old, unwanted clients like Lobo and Jonas who went undercover as waiters to ambush him. Besides insulting, repulsing, and assaulting patrons while undercover, the two bounty hunters also held a heath inspector against his will, resulting in the destruction of yet another business.[16]

Locations

  • Space City Robinson: The original Al's Diner was located on the satellite city in Sector Q. It had a kitschy pastel décor and an observation window. It was abandoned after being destroyed too many times, despite having good business days when Lobo wasn't around.
  • Hammer City, Malteez: The second premises in the crime-ridden Hammer City was a classic corner diner with a classy interior. The bad neighbourhood was no longer an issue once the whole city was levelled around them. Al made his fortune from this lone diner.
  • Weezil's World: Under the alias "Ned's Lair," this branch of the new franchise was given to Lobo as a gift, though not telling him until after he had destroyed it. The burned sign revealed "Main Man's Diner" underneath.
  • Doofer Street: The luxy diner where Al prepared a special lunch for his bankers to discuss his expansion plans.
  • Kolossus: On the planet of roads and perpetual driving, Al launched his first mobile diner. Darlene drove alongside customers while Al cooked and served.

See Also

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