What if I love her? 
Batman/Catwoman #9 is an issue of the series Batman/Catwoman (Volume 1) with a cover date of February, 2022. It was published on December 21, 2021.
Synopsis for "The Bat & The Cat, Chapter 9: O Little Town of Bethlehem"
Presently, the Joker is choking Andrea Beaumont at the Covington home with christmas lights. He is singing christmas carols, "O little town of Bethlehem!", he sings, urging Andrea to join. She cannot. She is choking. He continues urging, "Where's your christmas spirit?"
In the future, Oswald Cobblepot wakes up in his home. He looks in the mirror, contemplates his life choices, and gets dressed. Outside a chauffer waits for him with a limozine. Oswald gets inside, and the chauffer asks him where to. "Just drive me into the #%@$ river. Save some time.", he responds. However, Selina, who was waiting for him in the limo, asks him if he could drop her off first, as she "hate[s] getting wet". Oswald, taken by surprise, lunges towards Selina to attack, but is prompty kicked in the face by her and her high-heel as she explains to him her trouble with her daughter, Helena. Oswald doesn't listen, and is more concerned with his newly broken nose. Shes says that she needs a favor.
In the past, Selina asks the Joker if he is "joking". Joker giggles, smiling a toothy smile, and then almost on a dime his face changes to a worringly serious complexion, "No." Joker describes, in great detail, a dream he has. A dream in which he finds his way into the Batmans home, a tired Batmans home. He repeatedly stabs the Batman, whoever he is, as the Batman pleads with joker to stop. Joker can taste the Batman. The blood. The Joker is happy. Joker asks Selina where "he" lives, as it is common knowledge among the criminal underworld of Gotham that they are in a relationship. He then places a gun to Selinas head. "After all, it is christmas, dear. And I've been such a good boy." The Joker smiles a toothy smile.
Presently, the Joker is still urging Andrea to sing with him, pleading, at this point. But he then realizes that something is off, ducks, looks behind him and sees a baterang stuck into the wall. Across the room, Batman and Catwoman stand. Catwoman requests that she get to kill him, "It's christmas, I've been a good girl." "No." Joker explains that if they approach, he'll choke Andrea to death, which he would've done anyway if they hadn't just arrived.
In the future, Selina is realigning Oswalds nose and he is crying like a baby about it. After she is finished, she proceeds to explain how Helena is hunting her down, that there is a safe-house outside the city but Helenas essentially boxed the city in and she needs oswalds help. All the while He doesn't listen incredibly carefully, describing how he will frame her face when she dies; use her ears as ashtrays; eyes as pool balls; etc. Oswald asks her why he should help her, why he owes her. "I killed him. Everyone owes me."
In the past, Bruce is beating the bag, having Alfred hold it for him. He asks Alfred what's wrong with him. "I hardly understand, sir. You're a yound man in the prime of youth and you choose to dress up as a rodent and seek out monsters. What could possibly be wrong with that?" Bruce explains he was talking about Selina. "Ah. Now I see." Bruce is worried, because he sees "them" as a big club, all getting back together whenever they escape. It's a joke to them, and Selina is one of them. "Well, children can be so cruel. I'm sure they'll play with you next time, master Bruce." Bruce requests elaboration, as to what Alred means. "Are we finished? Excellent. You did very well with all the punching and whatnot. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a roast in the oven, and I'd like to get dinner on the table before you depart this evening. As ever, this may be the night you fight to your death, and I'd prefer you not do it on an empty stomach." Bruce asks what happens if he loves Selina. Alfred sighs. "It has been my experience that when one person loves another, be it of romantic nature or even......even the love a father carries for a son. One can forgive the other their...eccentrecies. So to speak." Bruce prompts Alfred. "Yes, master Bruce?" Bruce asks Alfred if he could hold the bag again. "Yes, master Bruce."
Presently, Joker doesn't know why everyone's so mad at him. He says Andreas the real villain. He expains how the poor Covingtons have wondered where their first-born child had gone all these years, and that she had him. She had him convinced he was her child, while the covingtons had only their imaginations as to where their poor boy had gotten. He prepares to kill Andrea, "...your angel of death awaits!", but Andrea doesn't react. He then realizes, "Oh. Oh, no. He's not waiting anymore, is he? He's...oh, he's got you now sweetie. You poor dead thing." Now with Jokers hostage dead, he reveals that there is also a bomb.
In the future, Oswald had finished a phone call. A plane is on its way to pick up Selina and take her out of Gotham. Selina thanks Oswald. He reminisces about the old days, "When it was all clues, and big props." Selina never tried clues, "Too much work." Oswald talks about how he would sometimes get Nygma to do his, but he would make them purposly simple so Oswald would get caught easily. Selina talks about when they all used to go out during the day, like a bunch of fools. Oswald replies, saying that they were all crazy back then. "No...not all of us."
In the past, Selina is taking the situation with extreme seriousness, but Joker keeps cracking cat-themed jokes. "What do you call a kitty who always disappoints you? A catastrophe."
Presently, Joker is explaining how he snuck into the home a week prior to wrap a gift for the family with their wrapping paper. He picks up his gift. He says the gift is a soccer ball. He also says that inside the ball is a bomb. He kicks the gift across the room. The house goes up in flames.
In the future, there's a dinging and a donging at the door. Oswald says he hopes Selina enjoys her trip. In the doorway stands Helena. Selina begins to sing. "O little town of Bethlehem, how still we see thee lie...above thy deep and dreamless sleep the silent stars go by..."
"Yet in thy dark streets shineth the everlasting light..."
"The hope and fears of all the years..."
"Are met in thee tonight."
Appearing in "The Bat & The Cat, Chapter 9: O Little Town of Bethlehem"
Featured Characters:
Supporting Characters:
- Alfred Pennyworth (Flashback only)
Antagonists:
- Catwoman (Flashback and main story)
- Joker (Flashback only)
- Phantasm (Flashback only) (Apparent Death)
- The Penguin
Other Characters:
- Edward Nygma (Mentioned only)
- Scarecrow (Mentioned only)
- Tweedledum and Tweedledee (Mentioned only)
Locations:
- Gotham City (Flashback and main story)
Items:
Vehicles:
See Also