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HELP WANTED. Looking for a few brassy lassies willing to make the world a better place, take a bite out of crime, and b a part of something bigger than themselves... There will be no background check, as experience with insubordinance will only work to your advantage in the hiring process.
But the clown-spankin' truth is this, our strength comes not from being whole, but from bein' broken differently. Because there's enough of us, we are whole together.
Ya wanna know what this is really about, Mistah J? It's about cognitive empathy. It's about finally understandin' what it was like ta be me in our relationship. By experiencin' what it's like ta be trapped.
Gotham needs you to get your @#$$ together, or we're all gonna die!
This can't be like all the other times. This story needs to change. It needs an ending.
With that in mind, we opted for the next best thing...a big, splashy holiday special!
My rational mind can recognize pain when I see it. But my rational mind is in a pretty small box. All tied up with a bow on it.
Hey, Grifter! Anyone ever tell you you're supposed to break out of jail-- not into it, you idiot?
Welcome, ladies and genocides! Ta the Annual Villain Awards!''
Holee hairy scarlet an' scary! What the fuzzy hell are YOU? I mean...WHO the fuzzy hell are you?
Okay, my li'l sea treasure...Let's see if ya got any interestin' messages in you.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! It's hysterical, Mr. J! Welp, scratch one slinky stink bomb! Let her have it, puddin'!
Right now what I want... is to hold onto what I have. Because without that, I'm not sure I have anything. Aww, jeez! I blew the whistle on him! What was I thinking?!
My book, Red Tool. I never lose.
Not everyone understands her intentions are for the good' of the whole wide world! I'm her best friend.
Mmmm, spiked eggnog. It's like the cream a' Christmas in a spoon!
Holee-Clusterfolee, it's a friggin' zoo in here!
Bruce Wayne, yer millionaire butt is sooo mine.
I would be instigating mayhem everywhere I go!
Understood, Dr. Hertz. Too much of anything is no good. Not.
Nice to meet'cha too. Anyone ever tell you your breath stinks of cheese farts?
Sorry. I was tryin' out somethin' for our new team.
Well, if you ain't findin' my bodacious bongos distractin'-- I'm sure you'll be mesmerized by my resplendent rear end!
Look, I'm in no mood for this crap. Especially after the day I been havin!
What's gonna happen here is, I'm gonna turn off the lights fer two minutes, an' when I turn 'em back on, whoever's still standin' gets the job.
I must let the world know about my craving. I want pancakes and I want them now!
Yeah, but it's like twenty-five bucks now. They oughta give you a massage with that, y'know? I mean, I can almost buy five comics with that. It's crime on a Wednesday, I tell ya.
Gotham's so pretty from this distance. I miss my friends, but the city itself has changed ... I've changed, too. I love the home I have now."
I love it! It's so... cinematic!
The rest of you have five seconds before I take your tacky tickle toys and find new places ta shove 'em!
Maybe we should just let 'im... y'know... kick the bucket natcherly.
Holee stinkerolee! It smells like a turd's butthole back here.
Hey, shishka-bimbo... You try an' turn my friend into cole slaw... and I'm gonna go all hibachi steakhouse on your ass!
How's my babies? Anyone squeeze out some more ammo for mama?
What the Hell? That suit! What are you, the president'a my fan club?
Welcome, everybody, ta the greatest show in the whole wide world! My birth name is Harleen Quinzel, but my friends an' enemies know me simply as Harley Quinn! I will be your host-est with the most-est this evening!
What part of what I said didn't you guys get? If anyone is doin' any Scooby-Dooin' around here, it's me. Just me. No damned meddlin' kids allowed.
I'm Harley Quinn. Twice the smarts of Batman and all the vitamins of a bowl of oranges.
A hammer, a dog and no rules! What else could a gal want?!
Y'see, Granny, takin' people less fortunate than meself an' herdin' them ta certain death... it just ain't my je ne sais quoi.
Ugh...Th-That stings. Ya c-can hit me with that hammer a hundred times--but I learned the meanin' o' life! Or, at least, my life! There ain't nothin'--and I mean nothin'--I love more than seein' a grade-A jerkface like you so furious! I'm havin' the time o' my life!
Attention Losers! Ya just messed with the wrooooong secret headquarters! So says Harley Quinn!... I can play whack-a-mook all day, ya mooks!
Let's be real, yer dyin' for the approval of yer dad, and he ain't even qualified to give it! He should always want ya to be the best version of yerself, even if ya fight about it! Don't become a monster for someone who doesn't even want the best for ya!
Listen up! What's the best holiday? Christmas! I don't need to tell ya, I been havin' a real hard time lately! An' Christmas has been the one thing I'm lookin' forward to! If ya ruin it fer me... I'll kill all y'all and hang ya with th' stockings! Ho ho ho!
I like ta cause a ruckus as much as anyone. What I don't understand is -- why do it for such boring old ideas?! I mean, if yer gonna be evil, at least make it interestin'.
Bats -- after all we've been through, all the ups and downs -- ya really think I'm irredeemable?
I took on Apokolips! Just like she said! Heck, I survived a relationship with th' Joker! I got more guts in my boot heel than she does in her entire family!
Don't worry, ma. I already laughed in the face a Death once today. An' if he comes back, I'll do it again.
I mean, for one thing...you thought you could tie me up? Me? I'll have you know, professionals have tied me up--and not just Ivy on date night, either!
We usually do bat for the bad guys. Pun intended. But where has it gotten us? It's the same joke over and over. We've heard that punch line. But maybe we need a change. Maybe we should try being heroes. ...And not just when we're framed for a bunch of murders. For real. ...Babe?
What kind of alien ass do I gotta kick?!
I'm gonna creatify me some art!
We had two bags a' catnip, seventy-five rounds a' hollow point bullets, half a bag a' fried bacon an' three copies a' Death of Superman.
Love makes ya crazy, Mistah V, but sometimes ya get so mixed up an' crazy in love, y'can't tell that yer sweetie is nasty an' yer relationship is toxic.
Hey, so, this has been so fun. But sadly, I got to go. Now, as I do... I want to leave you with one thought. A reminder, really. Booster did it!
Wait, Wally's alive?!
Body not working like it should, Middy? Parasite's pirating your enhancements. Gotta change your Wi-Fi password regularly, I always say.
Ya wanna know what else I think about the Fist of Cain? I think they're gonna haveta do a major membership drive after this.
Aw, Mr. Reed. You thought you could "outevil" us. The Friggin' Suicide Squad. You made a deal with demons. What'd you think would happen, ya silly goose?
Harley, I'm trying to figure out why you're trapped. Why you're trapped in a cycle you can't seem to escape. I want to set you free.
Trust me, if anyone should know about him, it's me. He was the biggest mistake of my life... Do not let him be yours.
Although it was intriguing, I felt what I was doing was nothing extraordinary and found myself drawn back ta the subject that has always had my interest. The criminal mind.
Dude, I have white skin, two colors of hair, and I dress like a roller derby reject. What part of "Covert" do you think I do?
We're all a li'l screwy in the brain, Floyd... But the shrink in me says you've gotta way better chance of helping your daughter if you're still alive.
Well, aren't you a peach? There are a ton of things I hate about myself, but my face isn't one of them, so I think I'll keep that.
You were dead. I'm positive of it. And I got thirty-six stitches in my wrist yesterday. Now look. Gone. They're pumping us with something.
Nothing says l'Chaim like a girl dressed in a stripper clown outfit wielding a hundred-pound mallet.
Wheee...! This is just like a video game I love called Zombie Wombie. I can get all the way to the last level! It's where I always die.
Boy, taking care of babies is harder than it looks.
It's so nice to get out of prison, you guys! I mean... it can get kind of oppressive being a bad guy covertly working for the good guys, taking out other bad guys because of the brain bombs the good guys illegally and immorally put in our brains!
Maybe we choose madness. Maybe it chooses us. I don't know. Once, a long time ago, I was Dr. Harleen Quinzel, psychotherapist. Maybe she'd have known. But let's imagine, for a second, that we do choose madness. Why would anyone do that, do you think? Perhaps it's because the insane realize, at some quantum emotional level, that we are alone in this indifferent universe and always will be. And madness is company. Another voice in the wilderness. White noise to break the silence you ain't ever coming back from...
You're a slave, I'm a slave, we go kill a few more people in the name of one's person's justification of freedom when what they really mean is...CONTROL!
I got a message for you from Waller. She says, "I was right, Caitlin. And this is who you really are. Bitch."
You said it yourself, Amanda. I'm a killer. We are all killers. This is the Suicide Squad. You want to use criminals to save the world? This is what you get. We are not heroes. So blow my brains out if you need to, Waller. Kill me. Better dead than your slave.
Y'know, reader with hands over eyes...I'm amazed to think, in this brief oasis moment of frozen lucidity amidst the tumult...that we're actually gonna make it. We are definitely gonna make it...I am an excellent driver....AHHHHH!!! Whose $%&£&%$ idea was this again?!
Y'know, it's ironic. And not in the "10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife" sense. America's the land of the free. Someone commits a crime? You remove their freedom. Throw them behind bars. Then you go back about your lives. Your free lives of rigid nine-to-five schedules. Of mortgages that last a whole adult life. Of doing what your president or news outlet of choice or yer preacher tells you.... See, that's the appeal of madness--true freedom. No doors! No walls! No pants! All da fun thoughts all da time....
Yeah, I was looking forward to a knockout mallet big-brawl showdown with POTUS himself! I mean, one of us is crazy, right?
Every super-villain in Belle Reve has gone murdery-loco... And I, Harley Quinn -- the mad quinnpin of crime --- have just got my sanity back...
I'm not gonna lie... ...It's never ended well.
This city is 🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇 up in the head! I can officially give it that diagnosis because I'm a doctor. And cuz I'm 🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇 up in the head, too.
Naughty naughty, Space-head jerk! You wanted ta get inta my head, an' in turn I got inta yours -- an' with me came Mistah J.
If I'm not outta here in five seconds, somebody's gonna get their spleen ripped out. I mean it...spleenless! As in no spleen. About ta get a splenectomy. Adios spleen-ios, if you will. Spleen-free! Aw, ya get the idea.
Gotham is my world!
Christmas is a bust...
I haven't punched a clown in years!
Kiss th' ring, ya Nazis!
Do I have a crush on Booster Gold?! Ew!
Is Booster Gold catchin' feeling's?
Shut up, ya cornyass dork. Yer ruinin' th' moment.
Jeez, Harl, how many supporting cast members do you have?!
Don't need 'em. See if they can fly.
Childhood trauma or not... I just think you're a little $*&^.
You heard apathy, but, to me, his body language really said... "... Good job, Harley! I'm so glad you're back in Gotham!"
Welcome to the first-ever community support group for--
The Rag Tag group of rebels takin' out the Big Bad evil against the odds...
But it's not about the past. It's about the future and trying to make it a little better for the people I want in that future with me.
No matter how many times I blow that place up... it never gets old!
You worked for the Joker... a former clown... this... this is what Hugo was doing at S.A.F.E.... mind-control...
There's nothing more terrifying than falling in love.
Miss Kyle, for dateline lovelife, do ya think it's fair of Batman to come back to the city while you're still technically on a break?
I wanted to pick off right where we left off. But while you've been stuck in the ground, I've been on this journey... I've changed.
... I hate Keepsake most of all...
Thanks Kev. I just hope I can be the person they need...
... I'd say there's enough room in this world for more than one merry woman with a band of outcast do-gooders.
Are we teaming up, Batsy? Because this feels like we're teaming up!
Why would a Fed want my snow globe?
Metal claws? Wrong universe, cloaky!
I wanna see the world the way you do.
Startin' to remember... a little. Was in a time machine. A time machine I definitely shoudn't have been in.
This is for thinkin' Clooney is the best Batman! No one thinks that! Not even Clooney!
... guess I'm still a little bit of a villain.
Professor Incredulous says, "When it comes to time-travel, always remember the reason something didn't happen that way is-- that's not the way it happened."
All the Zoo Crew got flattened? 'Cause Captain Carrot didn't have his Vorpal Fish?
I can stop this. The question is... do I stop it?
I am in trouble with Lady Quark, defender of all this crap. The last thing I need to be doing is placing orders out of the Multiversal catalog.
That's right, I'm right. Except when it comes to counting, cuz there's eight of us.
She died? Wait, I was her. I mean, I simulated being her!
I'll give ya extra credit for botha yas to quit now!
... smell ya later, Multiverse!
All items (125)
- Harleen Quinzel (Prime Earth)
- Harley Quinn Vol 2 25
- Harley Quinn Vol 2 0
- Harley Quinn Vol 2 1
- Harley Quinn Vol 2 3
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- Harley Quinn Vol 2 22
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- Harley Quinn Vol 2 26
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 1
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 35
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 40
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 43
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- Harley Quinn Vol 3 54
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- Harley Quinn Vol 3 60
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- Harley Quinn Vol 3 68
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- Harley Quinn Vol 3 70
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 71
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- Harley Quinn Vol 3 74
- Harley Quinn Vol 3 75
- Harley Quinn Vol 4 1
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- Harley Quinn Vol 4 34
- Harley Quinn Vol 4 36
- Harley Quinn Vol 4 37
- Harley Quinn 25th Anniversary Special Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn 30th Anniversary Special Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn 2021 Annual Vol 4 1
- Harley Quinn 2022 Annual Vol 4 1
- Harley Quinn and Her Gang of Harleys Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn and Her Gang of Harleys Vol 1 3
- Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn and Power Girl Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn and Power Girl Vol 1 2
- Harley Quinn and Power Girl Vol 1 3
- Harley Quinn and Power Girl Vol 1 4
- Harley Quinn and Power Girl Vol 1 5
- Harley Quinn Annual Vol 2 1
- Harley Quinn Holiday Special Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn Invades Comic-Con International: San Diego Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn Valentine's Day Special Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn's Villain of the Year Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn/Gossamer Special Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn: Be Careful What You Wish For Special Edition Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn: Harley Loves Joker Vol 1 1
- Harley Quinn: Harley Loves Joker Vol 1 2
- Harley Quinn: Make 'em Laugh Vol 1 3 (Digital)
- Heroes in Crisis Vol 1 2
- Heroes in Crisis Vol 1 7
- Secret Origins Vol 3 4
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 2
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 3
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 15
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 16
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 19
- Suicide Squad Vol 4 21
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 8
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 11
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 19
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 21
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 23
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 25
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 26
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 38
- Suicide Squad Vol 5 39
- Suicide Squad Vol 6 6
- Suicide Squad Most Wanted: Deadshot and Katana Vol 1 3
- Suicide Squad Seven (Prime Earth)
- Suicide Squad: Black Files Vol 1 4
- Suicide Squad: War Crimes Special Vol 1 1