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He's not a hero! He's a fucking joke. 
Men who end up hanging from trees with secret compartments in their closets tend to think of themselves as good guys. And the people who protect them tend to think of themselves as good guys, too. But here's the thing about me, Sister Night: I eat good guys for breakfast.
People who wear masks are driven by trauma. They're obsessed with justice because of some injustice they suffered, usually when they were kids. Ergo, the mask. It hides the pain.
Three heroes die and they all show up at the pearly gates. God's there to decide what their eternal fates are going to be – heaven or hell. Our first hero is dressed up like a big owl. And God says, "I gifted you the ability to make fantastic inventions. And what did you do with this amazing talent?" And the Owl Guy says, "I made this really awesome flying ship, and lots of cool outfits and weapons, so that I could bring peace to the city." God asks, "So how many people did you kill?" Owl Guy seems offend. "Zero," he says. "I didn't take a single life." God frowns. "Sorry, Owl Guy. Your heart's in the right place. You're just too soft." And God snaps his fingers. And the hero goes to hell.
We all have family. Some of them we just don't talk about.
I don't know why I keep coming to these stupid phone booths and telling you jokes. It's not like you ever had a sense of humor. You're never gonna hear this anyway, probably. But sometimes it's... you know, it's nice to... Sometimes it's nice to pretend. These assholes down here still think you give a shit, even though you've been living on another fucking planet for thirty years. But we're not really worth giving a shit about anyway, are we?
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Angela Abar (Watchmen TV Series) -
Laurel Juspeczyk (Watchmen TV Series) -
Daniel Dreiberg (Watchmen TV Series) -
Edward Blake (Watchmen TV Series) -
Watchmen (TV Series) Episode: She Was Killed by Space Junk
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