"It Only Hurts When I Laugh, Part 1": After nearly a year beneath the dome, Metallo has decided that Metropolis requires order - a leader. That leader, he thinks, should be him. To that end, he has created an army of metallic men to help him. Fortunately,
- Ted, this could well be our best opportunity to save Metroplis and everyone in it. We need to embrace it.
Appearing in "It Only Hurts When I Laugh, Part 1"
- Justice League International
- Wonder Woman (Kingdom Come)
- Shazam (Kingdom Come)
- Obsidian (Kingdom Come)
- Nightstar (Kingdom Come)
- Jade (Kingdom Come)
- Huntress (Kingdom Come)
- Blue Beetle (Kingdom Come)
- Creeper (Kingdom Come)
- Captain Carrot (Earth-C)
- OMAC (Earth-AD)
- Aquaman (Flashpoint Timeline)
- Ocean Master (Flashpoint Timeline)
- Atomic Knights
- Plastic Man (Earth-Two)
- Swamp Thing (Pre-Crisis)
- Abby Arcane (Pre-Crisis)
- The Question (Earth-Four)
Synopsis for "It Only Hurts When I Laugh, Part 1"
After nearly a year beneath the dome, Metallo has decided that Metropolis requires order - a leader. That leader, he thinks, should be him. To that end, he has created an army of metallic men to help him. Fortunately, the Justice League International is prepared to put a stop to him. Though the team has lost their powers, Blue Beetle is going to great lengths to ensure that they are protected by his gadgets while they do their best without their abilities. Unmoved, Metallo breaks through the windows of The Bug and drags Ted out, explaining that the age of powered beings is over, and now technology rules. The irony is not lost on Ted, as he pulls out a device he perfected which completely disables Metallo and his army. Unfortunately, he'll have to spend ages fixing The Bug, for the foreseeable future as a result of the battle - not to mention mending his broken arm. Further misfortune befalls him when he learns that The Bug's destruction also destroyed an innocent man's store front, and he is to blame.
After the post-mortem meeting at JLI HQ, Ted passes up a night in bed with Fire in favour of repairing The Bug, and Martian Manhunter offers to help. As they work away at the vehicle, Ted expresses concern that they never seem to have time to fix anything in the world that the Dome created. J'onn admits that he isn't sure that the team is being proactive enough. What if they could break free of the dome? Ted reminds that they tried breaking free when it first came down, with unsatisfying results. Even so, J'onn reminds that he knows what it's like to lose a world, and to regret not having done enough to save it. He adds, though, that he doesn't intend to criticize, but rather to point out the necessity of fighting to save the world as it is. Just then, they are interrupted by Ice, who warns that something is happening on the roof.
Up there, the team hears a voice from beyond the dome warning that their confinement will soon end, and champions from all of the cities trapped on the planet Telos must fight each other for the survival of their city. As the dome disappears, the Justice League's powers return. The others are eager to use their powers to fight, but Ted is wary. He has no intention of being this Telos' puppet by fighting in forced battles. There must be another way.
Unfortunately, their challengers have already arrived from another Metropolis, and they are far more intent than Ted is on ensuring that their opponents fall for the sake of their city. Spotting them from his vantage point, Ted concedes that they have no choice but to fight.
- This book was first published on April 15, 2015.
- No special notes.
- In the Justice League International's HQ there is a trophy room that contains the Clock King's costume, Rocket Red Armor, Major Disaster's cloak, the Royal Flush Gang's King of Spades costume, Ten of Spades costume, and a Jack of Spades statue.
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