"The Big Brawl! Part Two: Pulp Friction!": Outside the Lobezno Warehouse, the opportunistic kid who spoke with Tartan Quarantino earlier is charging his friends five credits each for entry to the Big Brawl. With none of them having any cash, they offer up barter
- And that concludes our Big Brawl! I'm pleased to say that no sissy asked for medical aid...
Synopsis for "The Big Brawl! Part Two: Pulp Friction!"
Outside the Lobezno Warehouse, the opportunistic kid who spoke with Tartan Quarantino earlier is charging his friends five credits each for entry to the Big Brawl. With none of them having any cash, they offer up barter items; a one-legged frog, a fake dog turd, three gumballs, a cigar butt, and a condom. The kid sneaks his friends into the venue through a hole in the wall, just in time to witness Lobo get floored by Jackie Chin's sledgehammer.
Jackie stands over the dazed Czarnian and bludgeons his head relentlessly until it's reduced to mush and bone fragments. Jackie licks the gore from his weapon and mocks the spinal stump, before narrowly avoiding a blow from Ferrari's knobtail. With lightning agility, Jackie flips between the sparing Scalyfist and Quietus, taking them both down simultaneously. Across the ring, Jonas cracks Knobtail across the face with his daddy's thigh bone, while Paranoid Jones crawls beneath to reach the decapitated Lobo who is suppose to be guarding his life.
At the diner, Al anxiously watches over Lobo's bounty, the Big Bopper, adamant that something is going to ruin his diner. Darlene on the other hand, tries to calm her employer, pointing out that Lobo isn't even there and he hit the Bopper so hard he's completely docile. Al starts to see things from her positive perspective and decides to stop worrying, just as the Bopper wakes up.
Lunkhead and Titch P'zaz combine forces to knock out a two headed opponent, but Titch foolishly bonks his big brother several times on the back of the head, claiming his hand slipped. Lunkhead removes his tiny sibling from his backpack and tells him he's on his own. As the P'zaz brothers quarrel, Paranoid Jones reminds the headless Lobo of his obligation to protect him, causing the sentient torso to stand up, still honour bound by his word. With no ears, Jones uses Morse code to communicate with the body deprived of four senses.
As the Big Bopper stirs at Al's Diner, Darlene encourages Al to knock the outlaw unconscious again. Al's meek tap only earns him a far more forceful bop over the head in retaliation. The Bopper's eyes bulge when he sees the gorgeous waitress and he chases after her.
Paranoid Jones directs his puppet to fight his way out. Jonas bumps into his beheaded buddy only to be the first crowned by his mindlessly flailing ball and chain. Lobo accidentally takes out his own employer in the same swing, but follows through by slogging several other opponents. Across the field, the combat becomes intensely more brutal.
Darlene runs shrieking from the the diner, pursued eagerly by the Big Bopper who crashes through the wall rather than utilise the front door. In a panic, Darlene runs back inside with the Bopper close behind, demolishing another wall.
Murder squares off against Jackie Chin, who smashes through Murder's baseball bat as his sledgehammer impacts with his skull. Bringing Murder to his knees, Jackie rips off his right arm and beats him with it.
Al stumbles out of his premises nursing his head and surveys the damage. Tapping on the wall, he tells himself it could be a lot worse, when the entire building collapses. Darlene flees to the warehouse crying out for Lobo as his bounty trails lustfully behind her. Inside, Jackie meets Lobo again, hoping to put him down for good, but the Czarnian doesn't need ears to sense Darlene approaching in distress, and he finishes Jackie with two hits, removing his jaw with the second.
Buried up to his neck in rubble, Al's bald spot is used to strike a match. The stranger lights his cigar and introduces himself and his companions simply as the bastards who are after Paranoid Jones. They leave the hapless cook as they found him, throwing the match behind them which ignites the broken gas pipe.
Darlene hides behind Tartan, as what's left of Lobo clonks the Bopper over the head before shoving the iron ball in his mouth. Paranoid Jones recovers right as his aggressors storm into the building. He frantically taps orders to Lobo who uses the Bopper as a weapon. Crazed and disoriented, Lobo slips into an unstoppable frag-frenzy and crashes through the wall. With no one else left standing, Tartan proclaims Paranoid Jones the winner of the Big Brawl. Jones just looks at Tartan suspiciously and accuses him of being "one of them," striking him down with one punch. Jones breathes a sign of relief, finally able to relax with everyone unconscious, until he too is cracked over the head with a tire iron. Darlene stands over Jones and rebukes him for assaulting Mr. Quarantino while the kids cheer her for being the toughest of the tough. With the fight over, the kids immediately lose interest and decide to go throw stones at Lobo.
Behind the warehouse, Lobo's budding cranium sprouts out of his neck. He barely has time to comprehend his surroundings before he is bombarded by rocks.
Appearing in "The Big Brawl! Part Two: Pulp Friction!"
- Paranoid Jones
- Big Brawl Contestants
- The Big Bopper (Final appearance)
- The Bastards After Paranoid Jones (Single appearance)
- Tartan Quarantino
- Nosey Kid (Unnamed)
- Kid's Friends
- Bruce L'ee (The Galaxy's Greatest Fights! only; dies)
- While Jackie Chin's jaw is removed in the fight, there is no certainty that he died as with any of the other characters.
- Murder is referred to as "robot boy" by Jackie Chin who rips off a mechanical arm, despite the fact that Murder was previously shown as an organic being who wears an armoured exo-suit. He is seen without his armour in Lobo (Volume 2) #25.
- This issue also has a series of mini-strips throughout entitled, The Galaxy's Greatest Fights! The gag follows Bruce L'ee single-handedly taking down various alien invaders.
- Lobo Recommended Reading
- Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious (Volume 1)
- Bob, the Galactic Bum (Volume 1)
- Lobo (Volume 1)
- Lobo (Volume 2)
- Lobo: A Contract on Gawd (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Death and Taxes (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Highway to Hell (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Infanticide (Volume 1)
- Lobo/Mask (Volume 1)
- Lobo's Back (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Unamerican Gladiators (Volume 1)
- Lobo Unbound (Volume 1)
- Lobo (One-Shots)