- Callin' all heroic simps! Yer pals is croaked! WHO'S FRAGGIN' NEXT?!
- — Lobo
Lobo (Volume 2) #50 is an issue of the series Lobo (Volume 2) with a cover date of April, 1998.
Synopsis for "Dead Heroes Don't"
Lobo, dragging an innocent bystander, shouts out a challenge to all the superheroes, demanding they show themselves in five seconds or his hostage dies. With a flash of red, the hostage disappears from Lobo's clutches as the Flash rescues him. Placing the victim safely down, Flash removes the tape over his mouth, only to discover he's been gagged with a frag grenade also. With not even enough time for the world's fastest man to react, the explosion sprays the hostage's head everywhere. Disgusted with Lobo's despicable behaviour, Flash runs circles around the callous Czarnian. Within the crimson blur, Lobo casually takes out a calculator and approximates the speedster's inertia, tossing his hook just at the right moment for Flash to run straight into it. Still alive with the hook embedded into his forehead, the crippled Flash helplessly asks why the bounty hunter is doing this. The Main Man gouges Flash's eyes and explains that a mysterious man hired him to exterminate all the superheroes on Earth at one million credits per head. Flash wonders who would issue such a horrible order and Lobo answers him with a bullet.
No sooner than removing his hook from the Flash's skull, Lobo is bound by a lasso tossed by Big Barda as the Martian Manhunter confirms the Flash is dead. Lobo whistles for his hawg which swoops around the corner and targets Big Barda with a barrage of bullets. Shielding herself with the cover of a manhole, Barda deflects the incoming fire, but is not prepared for the bike to stay its course as it ploughs into her, skewering her torso. J'onn rips up a traffic light and swats Lobo before diving to pin him to the ground. Lobo counters by launching J'onn over his head into a wall. As the Martian Manhunter rises, Lobo suggests they take a cigar break and lobs an incendiary grenade. J'onn screams as he's engulfed by the flames, while Lobo gets close enough to light his cigar while finishing off the tormented Martian. Chaining the three corpses to the back of his bike, Lobo sets out to locate some more do-gooders to frag.
Superman Blue rescues an overturned bus that's rolled into a ravine and looks inside to see Lobo towing his friends on the news. He quickly intercepts Lobo and severs the chain before blasting him off of his ride. Superman solemnly inspects his dead friends while Lobo taunts him from the ground. Superman responds by dropping part of a building on top of the monster and blasts him with his energy bolts. Lobo dares the hero to kill him, knowing Superman wouldn't stoop to his level. The Man of Steel takes pause from his assault as Lobo tries to slash the hero, only for his hook to pass thought the being of living energy. Superman resumes his attack, beating Lobo down. The prepared bounty hunter, now knowing what he's facing, chucks an E.M.F. Oscillo-Disrupter at Superman, converting his energy form into a volatile explosion.
President Clinton addresses the nation to confirm that Superman is dead, enlisting the aid of all available superheroes. Lobo interrupts the President with a punch and hijacks the live feed, threatening to destroy New York City. Power Girl rallies the Sovereign Seven while elsewhere Kyle Rayner charges his ring in his apartment. Even in the future, the Legion of Super-Heroes assemble. In a diner, the Spectre confronts the Phantom Stranger, about stopping the atrocity, but the Stranger decides the hero community must stand or fall on their own.
Lobo revels in the onslaught, massacring the multitude of heroes until the numbers become too great and he retreats to a warehouse. The remaining heroic forces pursue him inside, illuminating the darkened room to discover it's a munitions cache. With all the heroes gathered in one place, Lobo lights the fuse to his trap and the conflagration levels the entire city.
Lobo's mangled remains lie with all the other corpses in the rubble, but he soon regenerates back to his former self, feeling rather proud. His mysterious employer appears, handing him a large bag of cash. Out of mild curiosity, Lobo asks who the stranger is. The man removes his hat and introduces himself as Keith Giffen.
An alarm clock jolts Wally West awake from his bad dream, but he's not the only one. Big Barda, J'onn J'onzz, Clark Kent, Kyle Rayner, Walter Thorrson, Andrew Nolan all recall the terrifying collective nightmare, with Aquaman vowing never to eat cheese for supper again.
Appearing in "Dead Heroes Don't"
Featured Characters:
- Lobo (In dream sequence only)
Supporting Characters:
- JLA (In dream sequence only)
- Flash (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Martian Manhunter (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Big Barda (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Superman Blue (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Green Lantern (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Aquaman (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Sovereign Seven (In dream sequence only)
- Reflex (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Power Girl (Dies in dream sequence only)
- Network (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Rampart (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Cruiser (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Cascade (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Indigo (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Legion of Super-Heroes (In dream sequence only)
- Ferro (Dies in dream sequence only; dreaming)
- Ultra Boy (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Saturn Girl (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Spark (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Apparition (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Cosmic Boy (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Brainiac 5 (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- The Spectre (In dream sequence only)
- Phantom Stranger (In dream sequence only)
Antagonists:
- The Giff (In dream sequence only)
Other Characters:
- Lobo's Hostage (Only appearance; dies in a dream sequence)
- President Clinton (In dream sequence only)
- Steel (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Plastic Man (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Captain Atom (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Supergirl (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Sentinel (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Mister Miracle (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Captain Marvel (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Mary Marvel (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Superboy (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Atom (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Starman (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Firestorm (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Impulse (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Young Heroes (In dream sequence only)
- Thunderhead (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
- Junior (Dies in dream sequence only; cameo)
Locations:
- United States of America
- New York City (In dream sequence only)
- Sovereign Seven Headquarters (In dream sequence only)
- Kyle Rayner's Apartment (In a dream sequence and awake)
- Diner (In dream sequence only)
- Legion of Super-Heroes Headquarters (In dream sequence only)
Concepts
Items:
- Incendiary Grenade (In dream sequence only)
- E.M.F. Oscillo-Disruptor (In dream sequence only)
- Green Lantern Ring (In dream sequence only)
- Green Lantern Power Battery (In dream sequence only)
- Cosmic Staff (In dream sequence only)
Vehicles:
- Lobo's Spacehog (In dream sequence only)
Notes
- Dawg (Cover only)
- Green Arrow (Cover only)
Trivia
See Also
Recommended Reading
- Lobo Recommended Reading
- Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious (Volume 1)
- Bob, the Galactic Bum (Volume 1)
- Lobo (Volume 1)
- Lobo (Volume 2)
- Lobo: A Contract on Gawd (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Death and Taxes (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Highway to Hell (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Infanticide (Volume 1)
- Lobo/Mask (Volume 1)
- Lobo's Back (Volume 1)
- Lobo: Unamerican Gladiators (Volume 1)
- Lobo Unbound (Volume 1)
- Lobo (One-Shots)